


Soar Once More

by DiggaDink



Category: Berserk (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Anal Sex, Domestic Fluff, Fauns & Satyrs, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Knotting, Love Confessions, M/M, Mythical Beings & Creatures, Oral Sex, Sexual Slavery, Tags May Change, Violence, Werewolves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2020-08-14
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:21:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 18,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25671223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DiggaDink/pseuds/DiggaDink
Summary: Shot down from the sky, the legendary white hawk falls from grace.
Relationships: Griffith/Guts (Berserk)
Comments: 11
Kudos: 65





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Heed the tag warnings, also, satyr!Griffith because why not? Also, no behelit because I said so.

When he finds him, he's broken both inside and out. The smile that normally tugs on the corners of his lips is gone and so is the glow in his eyes. He's quiet and submissive now. Guts was simply passing through this town and he'd have never thought he'd find the legendary fallen hawk at last. When Guts first spotted him, he almost didn't think it was true, the normal blindingly bright white wool upon his legs was black with dirt, matted and bald in some places. His eyes appear sunken into his skull and there's darkness beneath them. Griffith didn't even initially respond to him when he called him out, only staring blankly at him, almost in shock. Had Guts not been paying attention, he would've easily missed him. 

"Griffith!" Guts kneels before him and pulls him into a tight embrace. He's covered in filth and so skinny. He worries he could break him by squeezing too hard. Guts can feel his spine and see his ribs, it's amazing how he's able to stay conscious, "After so long, I've found you." Griffith's eyes were so lifeless and empty as they glared back at him, "Look at what they've done to you. Come with me." His hug tightens to the point of being painful.

This town is shitty, dark, and sketchy. There's human and animal waste everywhere. One sip of this town's water and you've got cholera. Griffith shouldn't have to stay here, old Griffith wouldn't even come close to this shit hole. His frail hands cradle his face,"Guts, it's you." His voice sounds so strained and hushed. Guts nods and pushes away his hair from his face. While satyr slaves were extremely common amongst noble humans, Guts never thought the day would come where he'd see Griffith in chains and obeying someone else's command like a soulless husk. 

"Who is your master? I just want to have a word." Guts lied, he was going to kill the man, or woman. He will not allow for someone to get away with this alive.

"I'm right here." A feminine voice behind him said, "You wanted a word?" So it was a woman. No matter, she can die.

Guts' upper lip curls in disgust at her appearance. A peasant, a filthy one at that and she seems ill with something based on the bumps and sores around her lips, "Who did you purchase him from? You're in no shape to afford a slave."

"You're one to talk," She scoffs "And I didn't buy him, I found him laid out on the side of the road not too far from here. He was probably someone else's slave until they got tired of him I guess." She explained. He glances down at Griffith as he picks knots out of his own wool on his legs, "I don't really want a slave, I don't have enough room for one so I'm trying to sell him if you don't mind. He won't sell for much but I'm willing to negotiate." The fact that she can say that to him makes him sick. It feels like a slap in the face.

Alright, he's had enough. Without a word, Guts brought his massive sword down on her right shoulder at an angle. The might of the thick blade hacked through her and stopped at her spine. She screams in agonizing pain and goes into shock while people look on. Crime must be so frequent, they've become blind to it, only looking away and keeping their distance. City guards couldn't care less, the majority of them were drunk, harassing the population, or hooking up at the many brothels here. Still, he should get out of here before he catches something, leave these people to roll around in their own shit like the pigs they are. Guts pulls his blade back from her bloodied corpse, "Guts?" Griffith seemed so numb to the murder. He doesn’t react or even seem to care. Odd, he fits right in with the rest of these people.

He picks him up, so light and delicate within his arms. Onlookers got out of his way and stayed out of his way as they should. Be a shame if he had to claim more lives today. Griffith doesn't put up a fight at all as he's swept off of his feet, or rather, hooves, "Where are you taking me?" He can barely hear his voice over the clicking of his horse's hooves against the pavement.

Guts responds, "Away from here, away from everybody." 

They've ridden all day and have traveled far but it's getting dark. He stops to set up camp for the night and Griffith finds a spot on the ground to lie down before Guts can finish setting up their bed rolls. His lips, so red, dry, and torn. Water. He needs water. Guts allows him to down the entire waterskin. He needs more. The desperation has Guts running out in pitch darkness with a poorly lit torch trying to find a body of water. When he finds one, he hastily fills up his waterskin and returns. Griffith drinks it all down quickly. Better get some food in him too, the only thing Guts currently has on him is some salted elk meat which he devours. It’s not much and it can’t restore all of his strength instantly, but it helps keep away the nauseating hunger for now. Hopefully he can make the journey back to Guts' cabin before his body fails.

"How do you feel?" Guts asked him, the first thing he said since they left town that morning.

Griffith replies, "Faint. Tired. Sick."

"I’ll go get you some more water." This time, he's more prepared, his torch is well lit and he managed to shoot an owl down with his bow on the way there. When he returns, he's afraid Griffith had already died, he wasn't responding to his calls. Guts shakes him awake harshly, "Shit," he sighs in relief. He was only sleeping, "Thought you died on me. Here, I got some more food." He plucks the owl's feathers and cooks its meat, giving it all to Griffith. He hesitates eating everything, offering him a leg, "Don't worry about me. You need it more than I do."

"Thank you." Guts hears him murmur. 

He watches him eat it all and stop to drink more water in silence. When he finishes eating, he falls back to sleep for a while. Guts stared up at the night sky and glanced back at Griffith when he heard him fidgeting while trying to stand up, "What's wrong?"

"I have to go." Oh. That. Of course. Guts holds him up while he does his business in the nearby bushes. Looks like he's in pain by the way he tensed up and there's blood in his urine. He's in even worse internal condition than he thought. When he's finished, he brings him closer to the fire and helps him lie back down.

"Let me try something. Let me know if this hurts." Guts taps on his lower back and Griffith makes a noise of discomfort in the back of his throat, "I knew it. Your kidneys are starting to fail and you might have a tract infection. Drink some more water." He holds the waterskin up to his cracked lips which he gulps down.

With him closer to the fire, he has a better view of him. He's been branded on his left side, just where his bare skin ends and the wool begins. Too much wool to make it out, but he knows it must be someone's initials. Guts finally lets himself fall asleep after Griffith does. Next morning, he wakes up, leans over and vomits. Must be from eating too much too quickly. Guts comforts him, gives him more water and carries him to his horse. They continue the remaining three day journey back home.

When they arrive, Guts is exhausted. His back hurts and so do his legs from being on that horse. Griffith must feel even worse. It's dawn but his sleep can wait. In his tiny cabin deep within the woods of uncharted territory, he prepares to wash his shattered form. He takes mental note of his wounds, poorly stitched up cuts, and scabs. He's covered in them and he'll have to somehow avoid them. Seeing how far the mighty has fallen is hard to swallow and hard to look at. Guts still can't believe it. It didn't feel right to see Griffith so obedient as if he were a loyal dog, or rather, a thrall. He was once a high-flying bird who was shot down, plucked of his flight feathers and then stuck into a cage, forgetting what the sense of freedom in flight was like. Grounded.

When the water heated to a comfortable temperature, he told him to strip, which he did. All of a sudden, he bursts into tears. It was heartbreaking to see him sniffle and cry into his hands, it destroyed him. The way Griffith avoided eye contact and looked at his own shaky hands, the way his bottom lip trembled, and the way he desperately tried to wipe away his tears. Guts felt like he was a kicked puppy and he quickly hugged him. It was the first time he's ever seen Griffith cry. There wasn’t much he could say but just apologise and gently pat his back. It must all be so overwhelming, to be on the verge of losing all sanity from years of physical torture, slavery, and torment only to be saved last minute so quickly. The only thing Guts could do for him was swear to himself that should he find all who did this to Griffith, he’d slay them where they stand. He calms him down enough to relax and allows Guts to bathe him.

His skin used to glow, unmarked and perfect all over. Now it's bruised, scarred, covered in scabs, "Are you going to be my new master now?" Griffith is so delirious, his speech is so slurred and slow. Guts wipes away all of the dirt and grime. His skin already looks brighter and whiter. All that remains were the scars.

"No. I'm not your new master." He answers.

He's so weak, moves so slow and sluggish. The Griffith he knew could hop and balance on the thin side of his blade, possessed quick reflexes, and was strong enough to over power him. The Griffith he knew was able to evade his strikes and could stop his powerful downward slash with only one arm. Seeing him like this was such a far cry, "What will you have me do?"

"Nothing, you don't have to do anything for me or anyone else." He answers.

"I can clean and cook you."

"Enough," He hugs him, "Your days of doing anything for anybody are over." Guts replies, "I'm so sorry this was done to you. I'm sorry I couldn't protect you." Griffith said nothing, only wiping away more tears, "I can get you through this, you just forgot how to fly after being grounded for so long and I'm going to have to teach you again." He wraps a towel and his arms around Griffith's, now clean, form, "You are nobody's slave anymore and you never will be. Get rid of the mindset that humans have authority over you." He pushed back his long bangs which now completely covers his face.

For the first time, Griffith nods and hugs him back, "I haven't forgotten about you Guts, and I- I missed you."

"I've missed you too, we all did." Guts replies.

Griffith raises his brows, "We? You mean the Hawks."

"Yes. Everybody's okay last I checked, but I lost contact with them. When I left and you went missing afterwards, they kind of fell apart and disbanded after they couldn't find you." He explained, "I managed to find Corkus, though."

"Corkus." Griffith repeated and grinned, "He's still around, huh? And not dead from that mouth of his that always got him in trouble."

“I’m sorry with how things turned out. I know you worked so hard to lead the Hawks only for it all to come to an end. Casca led them for a while, she tried her best.”

“I knew things would end up this way. I’m not surprised they've moved on without me.” It was a hard blow but there was nothing he could do. Griffith was in no shape to lead them once more.

Guts tries his best to gently detangle his long, white hair with his fingers. It's gotten significantly longer since the last time he saw him, now reaching below his hips, "See? If you can still remember people from the past, your mind can recover from this. I'll heal you."

When Griffith sleeps, Guts wonders if he dreams about his life before all of this shit. Before he was captured, beaten, and broken into submission like a mustang. He traces his fingers across the whip scars on his back and swipes his thumb over the holes on the rim of his oval ears that weren't there before. His master must've pierced his ears and made him wear earrings. Most of the hair on his ears is missing and thinning out from stress and there's hard skin tissue there, signs of an old infection. The four black horns on his head remained the same but they look like they were filled down slightly. The two on the top of his head curved sideways while the other two on the sizes of his head, in front of his ears, curled down then back up like a hook. A Jacob sheep satyr he was. A beautiful one. 

Guts' gaze traveled from his back to his legs. He should really shear him soon, but that can wait, winter isn't quite over and he'll still need his wool. His tail, now docked, as short as a stub. It used to reach his mid-thigh, now it hardly looks like he has a tail at all.

The fire in the hearth burned out a long time ago, and the cabin is getting colder and colder but beneath the furs and next to Griffith feels warmer than ever, "Is there something you wanted?" Maybe Griffith wasn't asleep yet, Guts pulled his hand away.

"Who was your master before that woman I killed?" Guts asks.

Griffith turns over on his back, "It was a nobleman. He bought me from the executioner, I was to be tortured and then executed, but he wanted me so in a way, he saved me." Griffith answers, "He treated me like his most prized possession to be strutted around and showed off. I was fed well. Then, he decided he was done with me and didn't want me anymore."

Guts quietly listened, raising his brow when he paused, "Why were you being tortured?"

"I- I slept with someone's daughter." He admits, "I pissed someone off. That nobleman bribed the executioner. When he was done with me, he intended on selling me or me, but he couldn't bring himself to do either." 

It all makes sense now. Griffith wouldn't run away and throw everything out he worked so hard for, especially when all everyone ever did to him was talk down on him. Humans would doubt him, calling him a "Simple minded stupid sheep" and that he'll never be good for anything else except serving. He was stowed away where nobody would find him to slowly wither away. Guts knew it, he always knew it. At the back of his mind he knew Griffith was in trouble. He often pondered if his search would end in tragedy. All for nothing, spending years trying to find him only to learn he'd been killed, "So that's." Guts' voice trailed off as realisation hit him, "I'm sorry. I could've stopped this had I reacted sooner," He frowns, "Had I returned sooner. I should've never left."

Guts buries his face into his shoulder and Griffith tenderly rubs his back, "You've found me, you've saved me."

"I've never given up searching for you. Everyone else cut their losses and suspended the search after two years, I never stopped trying to find you." Guts replies.

"Maybe this is what I get for sleeping around." He sighs. Silence hangs around them and Guts pulls him closer, surrounds him in his arms as if to shield him before Griffith continues, "Since he couldn't kill me, he had me taken far away from the city and surrendered the wilds. For the first time, I was free, but lost. I wasn't fed for days prior to that, I was so weak. I tried to find help, but I was exhausted. I passed out and waited to die or let some wild animal finish me off. Then that woman found me and tried to sell me." He went on, "The only thing of me that made her any money was the jewelry in my ears. Nobody wanted me. I must've stayed with her for months, I tried running but my hooves are too overgrown." Guts makes a mental note to trim those down tomorrow morning.

"Why did he ditch you? How can you go from prized possession to trash?" Guts adds.

"Because he found a younger, more attractive satyr to be his personal plaything and lost interest in me. Complained that my horns were too long, almost had them removed but changed his mind last second because he couldn't put me through the pain. Complained about me being too tall. Complained about everything involving me." Explained Griffith. His eyes, ever so blank and dark, staring blankly to the ceiling, "I'm- I'm no longer beautiful, aren't I?" His voice cracks and Guts hears his breath hitch as he sobs.

"Don't say that." He hugs him tighter, "Don't say that!" He repeats louder this time, "You're still just as gorgeous as the day I last saw you. Don't cry." Guts rubs the tears from his cheeks, "I know everyone has filled your head with nonsense, but don't listen to them, listen to me when I say you're still beautiful."

Griffith shouts over him, "I am nothing like I used to be."

"That's not true! Stop saying that." Guts yells in response but sighs, "This has only made you stronger." Griffith's sobs quiet down, but his shoulders still trembled. He's so skinny. Come morning, he's going out to get them a huge elk and watch Griffith chow down and eat as much as he wants. There will be no more rationing of anything around here, "Did he," Guts hesitates asking him this, "Did he touch you?" He places his fingertip on a bruise on his chest.

"Yes, they all did. Him and his friends." Guts felt his heart sink and anger boil up inside him. For all it was worth, he better not find this nobleman, any of his "friends" or the executioner for that matter. All of them would be unrecognizable by the time he's done with them.

"I'm sorry." He wants to undo everything, but the damage was already done and he couldn't make it go away. Instead, all he could do is hug him.

Griffith shuts his red eyes briefly, enjoying the warmth and sighs, "Ah, I've been so delirious. How long has it been?"

"Just over five years." Guts answers, "I'm sorry I couldn't find you sooner."

Griffith rolls over to his side and wipes away the remaining tears, "It's okay. I'm starting to feel like myself again around you. As a slave, I felt lost. I felt like I was suffocating, but with you, I feel like I breathe again." Guts pushes himself closer, until he feels his chest on Griffith's back. He's getting better already, he just needed to get out of that environment. It was probably the first time he's ever lain with someone like this and he must admit, it feels comforting to finally have someone to hold within his arms.

When Griffith finally awakens, the sun is at its highest point in the sky and Guts has returned from hunting. The air smells of metallic blood as Guts skins and field dresses an elk outside the cabin. He hasn't slept like this in forever, usually always being awoken for work early in the morning like dressing his master and helping the other satyrs in preparing a meal for the morning. Come evening, prepare dinner, then finally run a bath. It was harsh living underneath someone else like that. God forbid he ever talked back or mess something up. His wife was another story. She'd chain him up and take away his food privileges for a week, had him branded and his ears painfully pierced with thick earrings. One of the piercings in his left ear was botched. It was too close to the edge and it ripped. Now it's misshapen and a piece is missing on the rim.

Griffith thought about offing himself several times, always stopping to stare at the descent of the balcony to the ground below. The only thing that stopped him from jumping was the fact that the fall wasn't enough to kill him even if he were to land on his head. That'll only paralyze him, making him useless and a burden to everyone around him. Death would be better than that.

Guts starting the fire outside pulls him out of thought, "You up yet?" He calls through the open window, "Slept quite a long time, huh? How do you feel?"

Griffith slowly gets out of bed. It's hard to stand and keep his balance on his hooves, but he manages. He stretches his stiff limbs with a long yawn, "Hungry." He places his hand on his stomach.

"I know you are, I'll try to be quick with this." Guts answers, "I left you some more water, you should drink up."

Subconsciously, Griffith began cleaning up the cabin, sweeping out cobwebs, frogs, dust, and bugs outside through the open door, organizing the cabinets, and making up the bed. It was a habit and he wasn't aware of what he was doing until Guts called him out on it. Nevermind that, food was ready, simple stew. Some vegetables, tomato broth, and elk meat. This fairly plain stew had him shutting his eyes to savor it as if it'll all be taken away or this bowl was all he'll get for the rest of the day. Guts reassured him that it isn't going anywhere and encouraged him to get another bowl. He could afford to gain some weight and get back in shape. Griffith went in for another bowl, then a third, then a fourth. Guts watched on quietly smiling, seeing his friend light up as he ate.

"You know," He chimes in, "You should let me trim those down, they're extremely long, surprised you can still walk." Guts gestures to his hooves. Griffith glanced down at his cloven hooves, they were beginning to curl inwards and overlap each other. His bad diet, or lack thereof, made them chip and crack more easily. Guts spots signs of a previous recent hoof-rot infection on his left hoof based on the corrosion in the middle. Probably caught it when he was in that shitty town where Guts had found him.

"Okay, go for it." He watched as Guts grabbed a trimmer and got down on one knee. The tips were clipped down and he managed to pry out a painful pebble lodged in between his right hoof. When he was finished, it felt like a weight was lifted off of him, no longer does it feel like he has tree branches stuck on his hooves, "Thank you." He grins and leaned down to touch them, it's been so long since they've felt this groomed.

For the first time he feels full and sated. His stomach actually slightly bulged from all that stew he ate and water he drank. He can hardly keep his eyes open and remain sitting upright as he finishes his fifth bowl. Guts urged him back inside to sleep it off.

Guts didn't do much after that, opting to stay inside when the temperature plummeted as it began to rain for the rest of the day. Whatever snow was left on the ground hardened to ice. Griffith fell back to sleep to the pitter patter of the rain hitting the roof of the cabin, curled up on top of the furs on the floor in front of the hearth. Guts pulls another layer of bedding over him as he laid down behind him, once again, instinctively wrapping his arms around him as if he's afraid he'll be taken away. Hell, maybe he is afraid. He vows to never let anyone take him, never ever again he swears. They can stay in this small cabin for the rest of their lives. Grow old and grey together. They can't have children, but they can have plenty of animals. There's land all around them waiting to be claimed and settled on. He can hunt, fish, and build a bigger barn and a huge corral for livestock. They can have as many animals as they want. He can provide for him so he'll never have to lift a finger ever again. His days of doing work for someone else is over. They can be cow farmers way out here in the middle of nowhere and out of the way forever. Until death claims them. Should awaken one morning with Griffith cold within his arms, he hopes whatever God is watching takes him too so he wouldn't have to carry on for too long without him.

Griffith is the first to rise the following morning. It was a dark, gloomy and cold day. It rained throughout the night and into the early hours of the morning. Guts calls for him and is almost going to run out into the cold in a desperate search for him only to run into him on his way out, “Morning.” Griffith greets, “I went to get us more water since I drank it all last night.” In his hands, he held up the large bucket. Guts only stared silently as he steps passed him to set it on the table, “What’s wrong? You look upset.”

“Nothing. I was just worried that I lost you again.” Guts admits, “I was almost out the door trying to find you.”

Griffith grins and laughs, “I'm not going anywhere,” He said as he scoops up some water into a cup and takes a sip, “And I’m not made of glass.” Guts finds himself forgetting the fact that Griffith single-handedly bested him in combat on more than one occasion. He didn’t need anybody to baby him when he can kick some ass if he wants to.

“Right.” He agrees, “I’m just concerned about you and I still feel like you should rest some more. You’re already awake so early and for what reason? Your body still needs-”

He approaches him and wraps his arms around him, cutting him off from his sentence, “I’m flattered you care so much,” Griffith finds himself blushing, “But don’t worry, I’m in the first few steps of recovery.”

“Okay.” Guts wraps his arms around him as well, “I’m glad to see you on your feet so soon. Hard to think that just the day before you were hardly able to walk on your own.” They stay within each other's arms in embrace for a moment, “Well then, you should sit down, I’ll make you something to eat. Gotta get all your weight back somehow.” He runs his finger down his back and over his visible spine to make a point. It made Griffith shiver.

Griffith steps back and nods, watching as Guts starts the fire in the hearth. While he works on prepping them some food, Griffith steps outside for some more air. He explored around the cabin and managed to find some herbs that can be grinded down for tea. Guts was never really a tea person, but with some convincing, he might come around. Griffith takes a moment for himself to take in his environment. He was typically never allowed to leave his master’s chambers without supervision and was made to sleep on the floor with the other satyrs he kept as slaves. He began to ponder what fate befell them when he left? Did they get auctioned off to someone else or escape? Shame. He actually managed to befriend some of them and he hopes they're okay. At last he can be free, here with Guts and away from everybody else. He couldn’t believe he was once a slave, molded into a hollow husk of his former self. Forced into doing another’s bidding and beaten into submission. Griffith snaps himself out of thought. He should really be getting back before Guts start worrying again.

Inside, Guts made them stew again from leftovers, “You were out there for a long time, everything alright?” He asks.

Griffith sits at the able and scoops up a spoonful to blow on it, “Everything’s fine, I was just lost in thought.”

“Over what?” Guts sits at the table as well, right in front of him.

“That I’m here with you. That I’m still alive. I thought I’d never see you again yet you came for me. My knight in shining armor giving me a second chance at life.”

Guts admittedly grows flustered, “Hey, don’t start getting sappy now.”

He reaches across the table to place his hand on top of his, “Really, Guts. Thank you.” Guts wanted to say something else but stopped himself, “If it weren’t for you, I’d probably be dead by now.”

“Don’t worry about it. I’m sure you would’ve done the same for me.” Griffith nods. His smile was ever so warm and never left his lips, “I- listen,” he stutters as Griffith’s enchanting eyes appear wider when he raises his brows, “Eh, nevermind.” 

“What is it?”

“Nothing, now just isn’t a good time.” Guts quickly stuffs his mouth full of food.

Griffith only chuckles in amusement, “Okay, then.”

Griffith has been begging for a horse of his own but they’ll need to build a proper shelter first. He starts building a barn the following month. BlackBerry had a small shack built for one horse and the huge corral all to herself, she'll learn to share. He had already started on its foundation and main support beams. Griffith wanted to help but Guts insisted he’d sit this one out. His weight has started to come back but his ribs still remained fairly visible. 

He was petting his horse near the fence of the corral. BlackBerry, the gentle giant, bumped her head against his chest. It was her way of begging for a treat. Griffith feeds her a stalk of celery which she eagerly gobbles up. Guts approaches them and smiles at the sight, "I like her." She was a pitch black hefty draft horse. Short neck and compact body. She was so sweet. Carried him through the toughest of snow storms and never complained during the many long-distance journeys Guts spent trying to find Griffith. If it weren't for her, Guts' search would've been significantly delayed, "I wonder what happened to that white stallion I had, remember him?"

"Last I checked, Judeau had him. He's in good hands." Griffith smiles, relieved. He pets her massive neck and scratches her chin, "Do you want to ride her?"

At first, Guts offered to let him ride her around the forest. Try not to get lost, he said. Then he changed his mind on second thought. Griffith begged him to mount up anyways and she was strong enough to support them both. He doesn't want Griffith going off by himself, there isn't anywhere in the world where he wouldn't follow him and keep him in his sight. Guts settles behind him on BlackBerry's back and lets him take control of the reigns. They walk throughout the untamed land that surrounds his cabin, stopping at the nearby creek to hike down into it. It was shallow and not that impressive, but there was a waterfall at least and Griffith loved it.

Guts watched, amused at his antics. He was an amazing climber, effortlessly walking across a steep slope high off the lowest point of the creek. He comes back down to marvel at a huge snail slowly slithering its way over a rock, "It's about as big as my finger!" He laughed. It's been awhile since he was able to be free like this and it brings a smile to Guts' lips and warmth in his heart. Griffith seems so excited about everything. The fauna, the bugs, the birds. Everything.

When he's done exploring the creek, Guts leads him up and out and they keep going. They stop again at a river to drink some water and relax. What started off as being a simple break ends up with them both in the water. Guts strips and jumped in first before pulling Griffith in with him. It's ice cold and he watched him scramble to get out. His wool quickly absorbed water and appeared baggy, much like the fur on an angry, wet cat. At first he wasn't happy, but then, he laughed it off.

Guts felt bad, so he started a campfire and managed to catch a fish by hand. It wasn't huge, but it was enough for the both of them. Griffith lied on his back, staring at the blue sky above, "This has been fun. This whole day has been fun." Griffith smiles, "Been so long since I felt like this. I'm feeling like my old self again."

"Look at how fast you're recovering." Guts replies, "All you needed was some tlc."

Griffith smiles, "Thank you. For all you've done. I'll make it up to you."

"No need to do that." He smiles, "How's your, uh, kidneys doing?"

Griffith, embarrassed, answers, "Still hurts to pee."

“You’ll just have to keep drinking water is all. Get your kidneys back in action and flush out everything.” Guts settles himself closer to him. Griffith shuts his eyes and allows himself to relax in the sun with Guts at his side. The sound of bird chirping and the running water nearby soothes him. He feels at ease and safe. Guts suddenly placed himself over him, and Griffith flinched, "Stay here with me. Forever." Griffith remained silent, his eyes widening, "We can stay out here all alone, nobody will ever bother us or even know we're here. I can take care of you, I can even build us a bigger home if you want it." He went on, "I was thinking we can be cow farmers, or goat farmers, or as many animals as you want. Look at all this land around us. It can all be ours."

Griffith blinks several times as if trying to process everything, "Sounds like you want to settle down with me. Is that what you want? I'm not too… Broken and ugly?"

"No you're not! You're perfect to me and you're just as beautiful as the day I left you." He runs his fingers through his hair, "Just think, we can have cows, goats, pigs, chickens. I don't have much experience with farming plants, but I can learn." Griffith enjoys how eager he was discussing their future. Guts found himself growing flustered, he's never felt this way before and it all feels like it's happening so fast. He pushes away any doubts in his mind, this is something he should've said a long time ago and these feelings are something he should've reacted on before all this mess happened to Griffith, "There's no way we can be formally married, but that's fine. I don't need a priest or anybody else to symbolize our union."

Griffith blushed, "But Guts, I can't give you children. What use would I be?"

"I don't need children to be happy when I have you. All we'll ever need is each other." He leans down to kiss him. It's only a quick, shy peck because Guts doesn't have the slightest clue on how to kiss like that weird sex book Griffith once showed him. It makes his body hot all over, "It's a yes, then? You'll stay here with me so we can grow together?"

"It's a yes." Griffith repeats.

Guts smiles, "I'm not rushing or pressuring you, am I? This all came so sudden, I would’ve waited for a more romantic setting but this is the best I can do."

"Of course you aren't. Spending the rest of my days with you is something I should've done sooner. I've always been sweet on you, Guts. I'm surprised you never picked up on it, I thought I was being obvious. I sort of pushed away my feelings for you after you didn't show interest. " He admits.

He was painfully obvious and Guts feels awful for leading him on like that. He knew exactly what he was trying to do but Guts ignored everything because he was too afraid of his own feelings, "Indeed you were. I was just too blind and reacted too slow to see that." He pulls him down for another, longer kiss, “I can’t believe it took me losing you to realize how much I love you.” It felt strange to say that to another man, it felt strange to him to utter that line. "I love you." Something he's never said to someone else in his life.

“I love you too. I always have. And I'm glad to see you act upon your feelings towards me.” Griffith cards his fingers through his spiky hair, "Let me establish one rule. No more throwing me into the freezing lake." He jokes.


	2. Chapter 2

He hasn't even been paying attention to how many years have passed initially. Seven years to be exact. Their property has grown and it's still growing. Guts turned that tiny cabin into a home for the hens. Their new home was even bigger, equipped with a proper bedroom, kitchen and bathing area. It was hard but he never gave up no matter how badly he'd fuck up his own fingers or how much the roof would leak after installation, "I know it isn't a castle like you wanted." He finds himself mumbling.

"It isn't, but it's home and it's more than I could've asked for. You went through all this trouble just to make me happy." Griffith kisses his cheek.

He's just like himself again. Seeing him glow for the first time in years is like watching a wilted, dying flower bloom. The hawk has taken to the sky again. Hawk. That nickname sticks in his mind. Back to the days when they were mercenaries, Griffith used to ramble on and on about what he'd do as a king, what his castle would look like, how big he'd grow his empire, how he'd conquer all and eradicate all slavery and stigma within his territory. It's all gone, he doesn't talk about it anymore.

Guts often ponders if he forgot about it or simply lost interest in it. As he sits down in his chair to eat dinner, "Griffith, do you remember when you wanted to be a king, what happened to that dream?"

"Ah, that. Nothing happened to it, it's just, well I have you now. I realized what I truly needed in life wasn't a huge fancy castle or a crown on my head. It was you. That dream of mine was a want and you are a need." He smiles, "Maybe had I seen it sooner, none of that wouldn't have happened to me. I should've just admitted my feelings towards you. Maybe you would've felt the same way back then."

Part of Guts feels bad. He couldn't give him a castle or an empire even if he tried, "I didn't take it away from you by tying you down, did I?"

"Of course you didn't. Being here with you is better than ever." Griffith holds his hand over the table and Guts smiles in response.

Griffith heads outside to tend to his mare, named her Diva from her feisty attitude. A beautiful, white show horse. Long mane and tail which he braided flowers into himself. Seeing him interact with her and ride her around the property made Guts smile. They'd then go on a short ride together with the dogs in tow, just to patrol the perimeter and check their traps. It's almost winter again and the wolves tend to get desperate enough to foolishly trespass on their territory. Last winter, Guts had to kill four of them in one season after they kept killing their goats. On the subject of wolves, Guts is sure a wolfman lives out here as well. Werewolves are common, it's just hard to tell who is one and who isn't. They blend in with the general population easily. Just like vampires.

"What makes you say that? Seen any prints in the dirt and snow?" Griffith chimes in, "You know, I've always wanted to see a werewolf myself."

Guts chuckles, "Not on a horse you don't. They are dangerous, strong, and can keep up with the fastest of horse."

"Have you seen it?" He eagerly pressed on, jokingly bumping Diva against BlackBerry and she huffs in agitation.

Guts pats his mare, "No, I didn't. But I heard it howling, not like any normal wolf howl, this one sounded more like a savage roar."

Griffith's eyes widened in fascination, "Wonder if there's more of them, hm? They probably must know we're here, they don't seem like they want any trouble."

"Well, pack or not, I hope they stay away. Be a shame if I had to kill someone out here."

Griffith laughs, "You still haven't changed."

Griffith and that nag were inseparable. Guts remembers the day he purchased her. He took Griffith all the way into civilization. This city had paved roads, fancy establishments and snobby rich folk everywhere. He needed to be on his guard. The walk to the inner city was a nightmare. They were told to dismount and lead their horse because it's the law. Too many people and wagons on the street to ride through. He always hated shit like this. Too crowded, too many people, too many animals all in one spot. Feels hard to breathe and these uptight guardsmen aren't helping.

Griffith told him he always wanted one of those beautiful show horses and if it's a show horse he wants, it's a show horse he'll get but those can only be found in big cities like this one. A horse from a peasant town can't even come close.

The journey took several days. People were surprised to see a satyr walking side-by-side with a human freely through the streets. Slaves were only allowed to walk behind their masters. Guts defensively grabs his hand and squeezes. A serious relationship like theirs is frowned upon, not to mention that they're both men. Although, everyone mistook Griffith for a woman. This city removed satyr horns by law and they weren't allowed to read or write. He tells Griffith to stay close, never let go of his hand, and don't even make eye contact with any of these people.

They pass by an auction and Griffith stops to stare, he wishes he could do something, but that could excite a revolt and doing so is an instant death sentence. Guts hastily pulls him along, "Don't look." He whispers. He should've really left him at home but Griffith insisted he came along because Guts might pick out a horse he didn't like.

Guts made the mistake of letting his hand go to calm BlackBerry after she got startled from a dog barking and running passed them. In this short span of time, some drunkards in an alley called out, "Fetch us some wine, little lamb."

"Piss off." He wanted to knock them all out, but Griffith pulled on his arm to lead him away.

They can hardly make it to the stables without someone glancing their way and pointing. These fucking people make him sick. He already had to tell off an overzealous city guard that they weren't residents and they were just passing through, nobody's dehorning Griffith, not while he's still breathing.

He never wanted to bring Griffith into big cities like this one for this exact reason. The humans around here feel so entitled to anything that isn't a human. No creature was safe from them. Minotaurs dealt with their shit too.

They managed to find Pippin with a few other minotaurs in the marketplace. He found success in mining and selling ores. He was surprised to see Griffith alive and well, even reached out to hug him. Guts congratulates him on moving up in this world all by himself, no matter how hard humans try to keep him down. 

When they arrived at the city's stables, the caretaker showed them all of his available horses, but avoided one. She was white all over, Guts knew Griffith would be all over her like flies on shit. Griffith pointed her out and the caretaker warned him how aggressive she was and how badly she hated everyone. Despite that, she lets Griffith pet her. She hated everyone except for him apparently. Griffith simply states, "I want this one."

Diva hated seemingly everything, including Guts. She hates the dogs, hates the cats, hates the chickens, she even hates it when a harmless bird lands in her corral. She likes the goats at least. They were the only thing, besides Griffith, she didn't hate. Diva couldn't stand it when Guts tried to do something as simple as clean out her stable. He always had to ask Griffith to put her outside first. At least she makes the task easier because she pees in one corner and poops in the other. She was such a lady and demanded to be treated as such or there will be hell to pay.

Even now, she always stares at him sideways and pin her ears to her head whenever he'd walk by, "Fuck you too, then." Guts mumbles under his breath as he passes by her stable, "You don't like me, I don't like you either."

"Guts, are you arguing with Diva again?" He heard Griffith chime in from the upper level of the barn.

"N-no!" Griffith only laughs at him and he flips the mare off, only for her to raise her tail and drop a fresh pile of shit in her stable after Guts had already cleaned it out. Sometimes, he regrets buying her.

The snow thaws as a new year begins. After a long day, Guts returns inside with eggs, "The apple trees are finally maturing. We'll have apples soon. You should make us some pie or something."

Griffith kneads dough on the countertop and grins, "I will, I will." Movement catches his attention through the window, "Aw, god dammit." He heard him curse.

"What?" Guts quickly turned around.

"That hog is back. I don't want him getting to our sows again, I just reinforced that fence." He complains. Guts joins him at his side, sure enough, that same boar from before returned. He still has the end of an arrow sticking out of his back. A bad shot from Guts he received a month ago. He was already pulling up their wheat, "Do something before he eats everything."

"Alright, alright." He replies, whistling for the dogs as he grabs his bow, they perk up and immediately run outside the moment the door opens. They bark and vigorously chase the fleeing boar into the forest and Guts quickly mounts his other mare to chase after him. He nearly kicks her to death to catch up and she huffs in agitation as she reaches top speed. Despite that pig's size, he was fast.

This will be the last time he comes on their property, he swears he won't fuck up his shot this time should he need to shoot. Wild boars and hog herds in general were the exact reason as to why they struggled so badly their first and second year. They always tore up and destroyed their crops or broke into the pig pen and got their pigs sick or killed them. Guts started setting up traps for them ever since and the smell of dogs keeps them away, but occasionally they can slither back onto their property for easy pickings every once in a while. 

The dogs must've caught up with him, judging by their howling and its squeals. By the time he gets to them, the dogs have taunted and tire him out enough for one to hold him down by the ear. He dismounts and puts it down with a single jab to its heart. Looks like they'll be having boar's meat tonight.

By the time he's finished skinning and field dressing the boar, the sun has dipped below the trees. He spares some meat for dog and cat supper and returns home.

Guts cooks them up a roast to go with the bread, "Look at what I got." Their dogs eagerly chow down on their own food loudly while Griffith unveils a bottle of wine, "Been a while since we had something like this." He pours them both a tankard's full.

"Hm, looks fancy, when did you get this?" He picks up his tankard.

"Got it back when we went to get Diva. Pippin gave it to me as a gift, I kept it a secret from you. Hope you don't mind, I just wanted it to age for a couple more years." He holds his tankard up, "To us and our prosperity." Guts taps their cups together and they both drink, "We've come so far. Seems like only yesterday were we struggling to grow anything out here and I was worried we were going to starve. But you kept my head up, took care of me. You dragged me out of the dark and into the light."

Guts leans over to kiss him, "I try my best."

"I love you." He smiles, "You're the brightest star in my night sky." They drank the whole bottle that night and Griffith is already getting touchy with him. Guts picks him up and out of his chair. It's time to go to the bedroom with this.

Griffith rolls off of him and onto his side. Sated, satisfied and staring at the ceiling. Guts pulls him in while he catches his breath. They just fucked like rabid animals, but he wants him one more time. He rolls on top of him and holds his legs up while he thrusts inside. Griffith takes him so well and with little resistance. He must be still sensitive from his orgasm earlier based on his trembling, but begs for more. He tells him he loves him, tells him to fuck him harder. Cries of his own name fell upon his ears and he didn't last long. Guts spends himself a second time.

They lie in silence until Griffith falls asleep. Once again, the fire in the hearth has burned out and it's getting cold. He pulls him in closer for warmth. This takes him far back to the first night he brought him home to his tiny cabin. His wounds have healed, but the scars remain. His fingers trace over the lashes on his torso and the brand on his hip. Since the weather began to rise, he's sheared himself low and every mark on his flesh is now fully visible.

The first time they made love, Griffith initiated everything. At first, Guts was okay with only having his hand to pleasure himself, he doesn't need intimacy with him to be happy after all he's been through. But one night, as he was cleaning their recently harvested potatoes, he felt his hands on him. They started on his shoulders then down his back to wrap his arms around him and hug him from behind. Guts knew what he wanted, but hesitated for a moment, "Are you sure?" He asks him.

"Yes, I want you." Griffith responds. 

Guts carries him to bed, "You know you don't have to do this for me, right?"

"I know." His pale body erupts in goosebumps as Guts' cold nose pressed against his neck when he kissed him there, "But it isn't really about you, it's about me. And what I want you to make love to me." He spread his legs for him and he takes his place between them, "Touch me, it's okay." He whispers. 

Guts doesn't know how long it's been since he felt a warm, willing body beneath him. He finishes quickly, but works himself for another round. Guts has never had orgasm that intense in his life.

He puts Griffith first, always doing what he tells him to do. He pulls on his horns and kisses his neck just the way he likes it. When he spills, he almost sounds like he's crying. It always manages to make Guts panic, thinking something was wrong but he's reassured with soft kisses to his face. They fell asleep in each other's arms and basked in each other's warmth.

Griffith sometimes wishes he could have children, it'd be so heart-warming to see a smaller version of himself and Guts combined running around. Typically after settling down comes the pitter patter of little feet. The only pitter patter around here is the sound of dog's nails on the floor, that comes close at least. He loves them as if they were his own children. Guts always tells him that a home is a home so long as he has him with or without children.


	3. Chapter 3

Guts awakened late way past noon. Head hurting, hungover, slightly nauseated, and congested sinuses. Griffith is gone, so are the dogs and Diva. He must've taken the herd out to pasture because the corral was completely empty. Something he said he'd do a long time ago. It took him what felt like ages to get out of bed. He boils water for tea and adds peppermint leaves. His throat hurts. Not soon after sitting at the kitchen table, he sneezed and almost instantly his nose began to run. Guts sips from the mug and grimaced. Tea was not for him but Griffith smooth talked him into drinking it, "It's good for you." He claimed. He holds his face above the mug to inhale the minty steam.

Diva blowing snot out of her nose and swatting away flies with her tail snaps him out of thought. He's always spacing off like this, staring at the ground to disconnect from his environment. He'd always get scolded by his master for doing this when he was supposed to be tending to his duties. He's lucky he didn't get ambushed by a wolf pack or a bear. The sun's shine brings him warmth from the cool morning breeze that passes over him. Griffith watches the herd as they graze and the calves play. They'll be staying out here for the summer. He pats Diva's neck and mumbles, "Good girl." Surprisingly, she handles cattle herding well. He calls for the dogs and kicks at Diva's sides to gallop back home.

Guts sat on the bench on their porch, overlooking the garden and crop fields ahead. Smokey, one of their many cats, returns to him with a large, common pheasant in his mouth. It's still alive and exhausted from struggling, "Thanks, Smokey. I guess?" The bird's wings flap in vain to try to get away when Guts retrieves it. He was just about to let it go until Griffith and the dogs returned. Smokey doesn't like the dogs, he hisses and retreats underneath the porch.

He watched Griffith dismount to remove Diva's saddle and usher her into her corral with the goats who eagerly ran up to greet her and smell her, "Pheasant?"

"Yeah." Guts responds, "The cat brought it to me."

When he approached, he stopped on the stairs to the porch to frown, "You don't look too good. You sound really congested too."

"I'm feeling a little under the weather today." Guts sighs.

Griffith steps up the stairs to place his hand on his forehead, "Well, I know exactly what to make for you." He glared at the pheasant in his hand.

Griffith makes him pheasant breast soup that afternoon to which he eagerly eats up, "Good?"

"It's delicious. But I can barely taste it."

Griffith sips his own teaspoon of soup after blowing on it, "You have Smokey to thank for this." He smiles.

"You took the herd to pasture all by yourself?" Guts asked.

Griffith nods, "I know you get anxious and don't like it when I go off by myself, but I tried to wake you and you wouldn't get up so I left you alone, I just thought you weren't feeling good."

"Yeah, sorry about that. I don't even remember you trying to wake me, I must've been out cold." Guts sighs, "I'm glad you're learning to do it alone. This probably won't be the last day where you might have to do it without me." Guts stared at a lone piece of celery floating in the broth of his soup. "I know you don't like it when I go off by myself." That sentence stuck out to him. Maybe he's being too overprotective, it's been almost a decade since he found Griffith and now they're here, safe and alone. It's time he'd let his guard down and stop being on edge constantly. Nothing bad can ever happen out here, "I'm sorry." Guts replies.

"For what?"

"For being too overbearing. I should back off and give you more space."

Griffith smiles and eats another spoonful of soup, "It's okay. I kind of like how much you put me first. It tells me you love me and you'll never let me go. I really need that type of energy in my life."

"You're right," Guts reaches over the table to place his hand over his, "I just- I don't want to lose you again and I don't want anybody to take you away. My biggest regret in life was leaving you." Griffith only listens on quietly, "This all still seems like a dream, if it is, I hope I never wake up."

"And neither do I." His hand tenderly caressed his cheek, "I would kiss you but you're sick." He glanced at his empty bowl, "Finished? You should get some more rest and sleep it away before it gets worse." Guts nods in agreement and Griffith leads him back to bed. He pulls the blanket over him, "Now it looks like it's my turn to take care of you." He grins and rubs his forehead.

"You've always taken care of me. Sick or not." He sniffles.

"I know. I'm going to do more chores, okay? Whatever you need, just shout for me. I'll be outside."

When he awakens, it's dark and Griffith is at his side. One of the dogs must've hopped on the bed based on the weight on his ankle. He carefully maneuvered away so as to not wake them then step over the sleeping dogs surrounding the bed. Really, he should've considered building the dogs their own room or shack. 

Guts walks out of their bedroom, passing by his sword mounted on the wall and hearing a lone meow from somewhere above the cabinets. It's been such a long time since he's last wielded it, mostly using a bow and a simple blade or dagger to catch their supper. He grabs it by its handle and holds it within his two hands. Guts mimics the all too familiar action of his powerful downwards slash. It feels good to hold it again after so long. He nearly forgot about it. He was now a domestic farmer, living with his lover and their many animals. A farm has no need for an overkill sword like this one.

"Guts?" He heard Griffith's sleepy voice call out, "Is everything okay?"

He places his sword back on its mount on the wall, "Everything's fine."

"Come back to bed, I'm cold." Guts giggles to himself and returns to their bedroom.

"I'm here." He lies down in bed.

Griffith smirks, "Were you out there playing with that big ol' sword of yours?"

Guts' face heats up, "No, I was just-just-" He sighed, embarrassed.

"Playing with it." Griffith finished his sentence for him, "Reminiscing of the glory days, huh?" His face deepens in thought, "You aren't planning on running away to be a lone wolf again, are you?"

"No, of course not." He answers, "How could I do that to you when settling down was my idea?"

"Do you want to go back to that life?"

"No, I don't want to go back to that. I was directionless and wasn't even sure what my purpose in life was. I had nobody. Nobody to come home to and nobody to care for. I didn't know where I belonged. But with you, I've found it all." Guts holds his hand, "Are you going to reform the Hawks?"

"Do you want me to?"

Guts chuckled, "I asked you first, Griffith."

"No." He simply states. It came as a surprise to Guts, for sure he thought Griffith would eventually want to resume what he started, "All that is over. I built them to achieve my dream and I failed. Now it's time for me to move on just like they moved on. Some of them probably even have families now and can't be bothered with that anymore. It was all for nothing. They won't follow me to be led nowhere again, they'll think I'm a failure."

"You're not a failure, you got so far. Farther than any of those naysayers said you would. All they ever did was try to keep you down, yet you rose above them, something most satyrs couldn't do." Guts almost leans in to kiss him, but Griffith's hand to his face stops him.

"You're sick, remember?" He chuckles.

"Oh, right."

Guts wakes up alone and hot. He must've slept all morning. Griffith's blurry form came into focus and he holds a mug of hot tea to his face, "Drink up."

"Ugh." Guts sighs but sits up and takes the cup, "I swear this stuff doesn't work. It's all in your head." He wipes the sweat off his forehead.

Griffith must've noticed how sweaty he was, "You okay?"

"No." He sternly answers and sniffles.

"Here, blow your nose." Griffith hands him a rag to which Guts blows a disturbing amount of snot into, "Ew." He laughs.

Guts sips his tea, "God dammit. What is wrong with me," his ears feel like they're clogged up, "My sinuses won't allow me to taste this stuff."

"That's fine, just drink it."

"It doesn't work-"

"It doesn't work instantly." Griffith corrects, "Just stay in bed, some good rest will help you get better." He rubs his back. Guts rolls his eyes and continues to drink the pointless beverage, "I'll be outside, okay?"

Being bed-ridden quickly got old. He wasn't even sleepy anymore and Griffith won't allow him to do anything. It was boring, dull and slow. All he could do is play with some of the cats who stepped inside through the open window. A white one named Blizzard rubs herself against his back and purrs. Then there was Shadow, a shy all black tom who watches from the window sill as Guts played with his friend. In a way, they reminded him of himself and Griffith. Black and white. Opposites but close. They frequently followed each other around the property, even slept together. Blizzard was used to interaction with others while Shadow stayed hidden to just watch. Exactly like he and Griffith. Guts glances outside, Griffith must've left to check on the herd, Diva was gone from the corral. The clouds blocking out the sun cooled everything off for a moment while he pets Smokey who hopped into his lap. He purrs loudly and licks his hand, "Bring me anything twitching and barely alive again?" He pets his ashen grey pelt. The sound of a loud bang startles them both, "The hell was that?" Once again, another bang and sounds of something being broken into.

Guts eagerly gets out of bed, "Griffith?" He calls and grabs his sword from its mount on the wall on the way out the door. He heard several of the dogs snarl and howl from the back of the house. He sprints around the building to discover a massive wolf tearing its way into the chicken coop, "Shit." He heard it growl and attempted to swat at a dog but missed. They surrounded the creature, biting at its rear and evading its attacks. Guts' heart raced, this was no normal wolf, it was a legendary werewolf. His suspensions were correct. Black all over and glowing red eyes. He didn't know what to do. Running would definitely make it chase after him and standing still will also make it charge at him. He thought about Griffith. Where is he? Could it have gotten to him too?

It sprints towards him faster than he could blink and all Guts could do is hold out his sword. He managed to cause it to impale itself on his blade, but it didn't seem phased in the slightest. The feeling of its massive clawed paw across his head and teeth in his shoulder made him scream so loud, his throat was instantly rendered raw. His dogs bite at his rear and tear at its ears, yet it didn't stop. Guts tries to punch it, only for it to catch his entire arm within its jaws and crush it instantly.

Another swat against his head and it makes him black out for a moment while it thrashes its head with his hand still in its mouth. When you're bring attacked by a coyote, you're supposed to fight back as best you could. When you're being attacked by a bear, you're supposed to play dead. When you're being attacked by a werewolf, all you can do is say your prayers and hope it finishes you off quickly.

His hand was too mangled beyond repair to hold up his sword and his vision was clouded with blood from his face and head. He heard a dog yelp loudly when the beast leans over and bites down on its face.

Diva's agitated huffing and Griffith's desperate shouting of his name came as a surprise to him. He wants to tell him to run away before it gets him too, but all that came from his throat was garbled nonsense, "Guts! Can you hear me?" He heard him, but he couldn't move or respond. The beast turns towards him and Diva knocks Griffith off her back when she turns around and sprints away in fear. He falls face down, but gets back on his feet and starts running towards their house. It chases him, but gets its wide shoulders caught in the narrow doorway. He picks up a piece of firewood and sets it ablaze inside the hearth. If there's one thing any animal is afraid of, it's fire, "Get the fuck back!" He screams and waves the flames around its face and it instantly backs off with a savage growl.

"Griff-" He coughs up blood. Everything got so dark so fast.

His own coughing wakes him up. He's alive and in so much pain he doesn't know what to do. Griffith's face came into view when he stood over him and sighed in relief, "Guts." He laid his head on his chest, "I thought I was going to lose you." He couldn't speak. His throat felt like someone ran a fork down the back of his throat. It wasn't until he blinked did he realize his right eye was bandaged up. Guts brings up an arm to touch it, only to discover a stub where his left hand was, "Don't panic," Griffith said but it made him want to freak out even more, "Stay calm." He kissed his forehead when he began to tremble and shed a tear from his remaining eye.

"Where," He coughs up a mix of mucus and blood, "Are we?"

"I've not the slightest clue. I just threw you on Berry, picked out a direction and ran, hoping for the best." He glares around the small room, "I didn't even read the sign to the town on the way in here." A medic returns with a cup of water to which Guts eagerly drinks up, "Everything will be okay."

Griffith tenderly rubs the back of his hand across his cheek until he falls asleep again. He awakens to darkness with the moon's light shining through the window. Guts feels the bed dip at his side where Griffith sleeps. He manages to lean his head up to see what's around him, more beds with some ill people in them. He doesn't remember falling asleep again but Griffith was gone when he woke up and the sun was out. A medic approached his bed with food and Guts sat up to be fed.

He wonders where Griffith is and how things are back on their ranch. They left so suddenly, dropped everything and ran off. Are the animals okay? What if that beast came back to tear them all to shreds as well? As if on cue, Griffith returns to him, "How do you feel?" He smiles and holds his hand within his.

"A little better." He answers, "The pain is starting to subside and I feel stronger today than yesterday."

"That's good." He sighs, "I barely slept at all. I've been so worried and scared."

Guts squeezes his hand, "I'm still here." He watched Griffith lean over in his chair to lay his head on the edge of the bed, "That wolf, I heard it trying to break into the chicken coop, when I ran out there it charged me." Guts explains, "I think it killed one of the dogs."

Griffith sighs, "It killed two of them. They were still kicking in pain and were still alive when I chased the wolf away with the torch. I didn't have time to help them, I had to get you to a proper medic in time." The news hurt them both. Their dogs were an extension of their tiny family and to lose two of them hurt, "I'm sorry. I know how much they mean to you."

Griffith wipes away a tear that falls down his cheek, "I should've-"

"There was nothing you could've done, listen, I feel bad about the dogs too, but they gave themselves up to try to protect you. Is that not what they were trained to do?" Guts only nods and Griffith wipes away another tear from his eye, "I'll bury them when we go back."

He places his hand on Griffith's head, "I'm glad you're okay, I thought it had gotten to you too, I passed out so quickly." He pauses to release a pained sigh, "At least you can finally say you've seen a werewolf, huh?" He jokes and Griffith chuckles in response.

Griffith's warm hand on his cheek makes him shut his eye, "Get some more rest. I'll go and try to find myself something to eat, I'm starved."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ty for your kind comments! Much appreciated.


	4. Chapter 4

His own overwhelming body heat and sweat wakes him. Something doesn't feel right. His heart beat so hard in his chest, he swears it feels like it's going to burst. Guts suddenly sitting up within the tiny bed must've woken Griffith up, "What's wrong?" He heard him ask. He couldn't answer due to his labored breathing, "Guts-" Griffith calls his name and he starts tearing off his own bandages despite his protests. He feels so hot, like he's suffocating in his own body heat and now there's an overwhelming feeling of itchiness all over his skin. Guts glares down at his own hand that seemingly grew in length. Has his hands always been this big? His nails protrude, wait, those are now claws and an absurd amount of hair beginning to lengthen through his skin pores all down his arm.

He shoves Griffith away when he touches him, "Get away from me!" He growls, attempting to stand but falls to the ground on his knees. It wasn't until then did he realize his wounds have healed like nothing ever happened. The gashes across his head, the large bite on his shoulder, and the exposed tissue on the stub of what remained of his hand gone, all gone.

"Guts, look at me!" Griffith calls out. He makes eye contact with Guts, noticing his remaining eye glow amber. His body freezes in place, watching his previously mortally wounded lover stand up and transform into the same beast that attacked him. His face elongated into a snout, spine cracking as it made him grow several feet taller, and his limbs lengthen. Griffith was stunned silent and all he could do was slowly back away until his back met the wall. The noise attracts attention and someone screams out for help which only sets him off. The bellowing roar he releases is deafening.

Medics and bystanders enter the room but immediately run away petrified. Someone slams the door shut, which was the only way in and out. The sick and ill tried their best to kick the door down, but it was barricaded from the other side. Shouts of, "Don't leave us in here!" And "Help, open the door!" Can be heard above Guts' growling and their screams were abruptly cut short when he lunged at them.

Griffith hid behind an overturned bed as Guts slammed his way through the barricaded door and sent shards of wood everywhere. He stands up just in time to see his beast form sprint through the narrow doorway, "Guts!" He calls out again but he was, expectantly, ignored. He's going to attack and kill everyone in this town who gets in his way or until he's struck down. It made Griffith fear for his life. He stands on his wobbly legs and steps over the bodies of mauled, slipping on blood and shoving his way past more bystanders who try to tend to the wounded.

He follows the destructive path that was left behind unt he's outside. Bodies of the dead littered the road. A few dead horses as well. Some were still alive and writhing in pain. He only hopes BlackBerry wasn't among them. He trips on the lower half of a woman. This town was defenceless against a threat such as that one, the very few guards it had stationed along the main road were dead, "Hey, are you okay?" He glares over his shoulder towards the woman's voice. It was the same medic that took care of Guts and fed him yesterday. She was shaken up and covered in other people's blood. He was glad to see her make it out alive.

"I-" he stutters and stares down at his trembling hands and his eyes sting with tears. The anguished screams of the critically injured silenced in the background as they succumbed to their injuries.The full moon looms above him as Griffith forces himself to come into terms what Guts has become.

He stayed awake all throughout the night and slept on the porch of the nearby pub when the sun peeks over the tree line. Griffith only sleeps for a few minutes until shouting wakes him up. Some peasants and what was left of the town guards have gathered at the center of the main street and rally. They demanded the beast be slain and to put a bounty on its head , "It was a werewolf!" A woman shouts, "Kill it before it comes back and kills us all!" Another voice shouts. Griffith's heart sinks. He hopes by now, Guts has morphed back into his human form to more easily hide from them, or better yet, hopes he's days away from this town.

"I know how important he is to you." It was that medic from before, she held out a cup of water and some cheese for him to eat, "You must find him before they do because only you can calm him. But if he can't control himself around you." She then passes him a silver dagger, "You know what you must do for his sake. A curse like that can only be cured with death." Griffith hesitantly retrieves the items and looks down at the blade in his hand. He'd have to put down the man he is bound to for "his own sake" Griffith rises from his position on the stairs and thanks her with a simple dip of his head. He manages to find BlackBerry stowed away safely behind the building where he left her. He mounts up and kicks her sides.

He doesn't know where he is or what he did. It all felt like a blur. One moment he felt like clawing at his own overheated skin and the next he's laid out nude in the wilds. Guts sits up and takes in his environment. The sun's light irritates his sensitive eyes as it shines through the tall trees above. His senses are overloaded, able to smell the stink of animal piss. Could it have been his? Possibly. Wait, he can smell again. Suddenly, he begins to salivate and he doubles over to vomit up blood and shredded remains of God knows what unfortunate animal, or person, he could've eaten. It all came flooding back to him. The screams of the people he effortlessly tears apart and trampled while escaping the town. The look of Griffith's face when he saw him rise from the floor in that form. Where was he? He didn't unknowingly kill him too, did he?

Guts stands up from the muddy forest floor, he's covered in morning dew and bug bites that itch. He can hear the rush of a nearby source of water and he quickly follows its sound. After nearing the river bank, he kneels and looks at himself. He's filthy, covered in blood, and seemingly hairier. All that chest hair wasn't there before. After having a drink and washing himself off, he figures he'd better lay low for a moment. People will be looking for him to exact revenge and the sight of a hairy, naked man coming out of a forest will arouse suspicion.

When he could no longer see the town behind him, Griffith started calling Guts' name as loud as he could. The only thing that responded to his desperate screams were silence, save for the chirping of birds. He's probably got until tonight to look for Guts before those pissed off townspeople do and all he's got are some dusty, faded prints in the dirt. Griffith studies them, they're huge and it looks like this animal was running on three limbs. Large, wolf-like prints on its hind legs and one large human-like hand with long, thick claws on the front. He makes sure to distort and ruin the tracks by purposefully making Berry step on them.

They appear to go off road and into the forest. He almost hesitates and tightens his nervous grip on the reins before sucking in air and slowly exhaling, "Okay." He said to himself and dismounts the mare to remove all of her gear and hide them within the tall grass, "I don't want you to be tied to a tree until you starve if I don't make it out," He states to her and removes her bridle, "I either come back with him or not at all." With that, he gives her one last pat on the shoulder before swatting her rear which causes her to gallop away and entered the unknown.

The sun was going down faster than he expected. He's lost the footprints long ago and he now has no idea where he's going. Griffith becomes faced with the realization that he could perish out here while trying to find Guts. Anything could kill him at this point. Bears, a wolf pack, or even Guts himself. His hands shake and his heavy, panicked breathing stings his throat. He's out of time. The sun is long gone and the night takes over. Those pissed off townsfolk are probably on the move by now. He covers the tip of a thick tree branch in tree sap and hastily attempts to start a fire. His lip quivering as he thinks about the worst. What if they have gotten to him before he did? Stumble upon them in the woods celebrating his slaying and lugging his beastly corpse back for a reward.

The damn fire wouldn't start, not even a simple little spark from all this friction. The palms of his hands are red and raw. Out of frustration, he throws the branch into the darkness ahead and sobs into his own hands. It's funny. Guts was traveling the continent trying to find him only for the roles to be reserved. Tree branches snap and dead leaves crumble beneath weight. Something is approaching him and it's large, he can't see at all but places his hand on the hilt of the silver dagger. Griffith braces for the worse. Be it a bear of even Guts, either way, he's probably going to be unrecognizable by the time it's done with him.

It huffs out air through its nose, wait, those are the huffs of a horse. It's Berry. She followed him way out here anyways, despite having the option to be free. He touches her nose then her neck and leans against her to cry. Griffith was such a fool to think he could do this by himself. It's a lost cause, Guts was gone and yet he was dumb enough to go out looking for him with hardly any means of defending himself. Guts wouldn't want him to come out here, searching for him knowing there's a risk that he'll rip him apart. He'd want him to go home where it's safe and leave him be. An out of control animal such as himself has no business being near someone like Griffith where he could turn on him at any time. So that's what he's going to do. Go home where it's safe. It's for the best. He needs to cut his losses. Perhaps Guts may return to him on his own terms but it won't end well.

He mounts her and she turns around to walk in the direction that she came from. He leans over to hold onto her and cry loudly into her mane. She walks forward until they meet the same road that he traveled down, didn't even bother to stop and put her gear back on. It won't matter anymore, it was Guts' saddle and he more than likely won't be coming back.

His weakened body hitting the ground wakes him upon impact. He's back home. The sun is beginning to rise, so it's a new day. Griffith doesn't know of Guts' fate, could he have been slain by that silver-weapon wielding mob? He doesn't want to think about it too much. His tired eyes glare around their property, not much has changed since their hasty departure. The horses were fine, so were the goats and cats. The dogs, on the other hand, appeared famished and were beginning to lose weight. They eagerly greet him with licks to his face and wagging tails. He wonders if they realize Guts is gone.

It takes everything within him to stand to his hooves and waddle inside their home. He should prepare supper for the dogs, but there isn't any meat. Any leftovers have gone bad by now. He'll have to go and hunt it seems, it was something Guts always did while he tended to their garden and animals. It's fine, he knows how to hunt perfectly well by himself.

The dogs were fed an entire whitetail buck he'd downed with one arrow to its chest. Chased its injured form into the brush where it fell and was brutally finished off by them. Griffith recalls seeing the fear in its eyes as he leaned over it, watching it be torn into. He touches the dagger on his hip that has been there since he'd received it from that girl. To think he probably had to do it to Guts made him want to rather drive the blade into himself.

He sweats from the heat as he buries the two deceased dogs. The hole was as deep as he could muster, until his already tender hands scream out in protest. He tosses the first shovel's worth of dirt over their remains before he falls to his knees and screams into the sky. Nobody could hear his screams way out here, unless that beast from before is in the area. If it attacks him now, he'd have nobody to save him, it will kill him and anything else that moves in this area. Griffith wouldn't even fight back, just submit and accept his death, not even allow himself to cry out for help. Guts wouldn't be there to save him from death like he'd done before.

The rough feeling of a cat's tongue on his cheek interrupts his nap. He sits up in the middle of the field and resumes burying his dogs until the sun goes down. When he retires to bed that night, the home feels so large, cold, and empty. He doesn't even bother lighting the hearth. Griffith curls up on himself on the bed as his stomach growls loudly and he ignores it by digging his overgrown nails into his own sides. He'll have to get used to living alone and carrying on without Guts. Guts did everything for him, and with him gone, it felt like he's lost half of himself.

He sleeps until midday the next day. He doesn't get out of bed all day, not even to eat or drink anything. His head hurts and he falls asleep occasionally throughout the day, but never stands up. He's relieved when the sun goes down and the light no longer shines through the bedroom window.

Disruptive dog growling and howling snaps him awake. He'd only been asleep for a few minutes, it's dark outside. Savage growls and roars can be heard over their barking. He sits up out of bed as the front door is broken into. It's that beast from before, here to finish what it started. Griffith ponders why them? Why did it have to come all this way to ruin what they've built together? Take away the one thing that gave his life meaning. Everything was going so well and perfect for them, only for it all to come crumbling down in an instant. Maybe it was all too good to be true.

He didn't have any fire to protect him this time, only that dagger at his side. He won't be using it though. It walks towards the open bedroom door and stares him down. Only this wasn't the beast from before, it looked at him with that amber eye, it was Guts. He could recognize him even while he's hidden underneath that animal he's become. Griffith calls the dogs off and they immediately stop their assault and cease their barking. They wagged their tails at Guts, held their heads low and submission. Even they knew deep down who he was. He should've known it was him, considering how not a single dog was injured on his way inside their house, "Guts." Griffith reaches down and removes the dagger from its sheath. He could tell Guts was shocked to see him do this, based on the way he recoiled and flattened his ears. Griffith tosses it to the side where it clang against the wooden floor.

His large form squeezes through the doorway and he stands on his hind legs at the foot of the bed, Griffith surrenders himself to him and lies back down on his back to stare at the ceiling above. He hopes it won't hurt as bad as he thinks it would. In the back of his mind, he's glad Guts has returned to him, even if it'll result in his death. The bed creaks loudly as it supports the weight of Guts leaning over him. Him dying at home in bed with his lover is the best thing he could ask for. He releases another helpless, loud sob and shuts his eyes when he leans over him.


	5. Chapter 5

The feeling of pain that comes with being bitten and clawed into never comes. At first, he suspects that he was already dead, gone before he could feel any real pain. He opens his tired eyes slowly and flinches at the sight of Guts', now human, form hovering above him. Griffith doesn't say anything as their lips lock passionately and slowly. He touches the hot skin along his back, almost scalding against his cold hands, "You've come back to me." They made long eye contact. The fear that was prevalent in Griffith's eyes when he'd first laid eyes on his wolf form was gone. The only thing he saw staring back at him was compassion, love, and adoration. Guts can hear his beating heart slow as lust replaces anxiety and terror.

"I'll always come back to you."

"But- the town, they're still pretty pissed at what happened. You know your face is posted everywhere by now, right?"

Guts nods, "I know. I saw my posters on the way here. They can't find us out here, I'll make sure of it." Surely everyone in the general vicinity of that small town was looking for him, wanting to claim the bounty. Peasants, witchers, and bounty hunters all sharing a common enemy. Doesn't matter, Guts will slaughter them all if he so much as catches a whiff of someone else's unfamiliar scent near their home. The drive to protect Griffith became even stronger than ever. He was just a wolf trying to protect his mate and livelihood.

"You weren't followed, were you?" Guts shakes his head as he kisses his neck, "How did you get away? I was so worried, I tried to run out and find you, but I couldn't do it. I had to turn back."

"I hid and laid low for a while before I made a move." Said Guts. Griffith attempting to follow him out there evidently brought him back home when he was able to find his scent as well as BlackBerry's and follow it. He tries to run his fingers through his air, but realizes he tried to do so with his left arm which was nothing but a stump, "Shit, sorry about that." Griffith chuckles at him, "This will take some time to get used to."

Griffith pulls on his neck to bring him down for a peck on the lips, "I didn't know what happened to you. I thought you wouldn't come back to protect me from yourself, but also, I thought you had been killed." His eyes water and Guts kisses his cheeks to calm his trembling.

"It'll take a lot more than pissed off poor people to kill me." Guts laughs, "I'll always come back to you, there isn't anywhere you can go where I won't follow."

Griffith touches his face and feels the hard stubble of hair on his palm that didn't used to be there, "Hm, you've gotten hairier. I've taken a liking to it already." He takes a moment to stare into his eye, "You're still so attractive and captivating."

"Really?" Guts blushes, "Even with one eye?"

"Yes, even with one eye." He agrees and giggles, "And to think you came in here to kill me. I for sure thought you'd eat me much like a spider does to her own mate."

Guts frowns and recalls the night of his first transformation. He'd killed so many people, slaughtered so many animals. For days he couldn't remember if he'd butchered Griffith or not until his scent led him back home, "We're not spiders now are we?"

"Luckily for me." He jokes. Guts kisses him again.

"I'm so glad to see you again." He buries his face into his neck to inhale his aroma.

Griffith's breath hitches in his throat, "Make love to me tonight. Take me like you'll never get to have me again." Guts didn't need to be told twice. Evidence of his arousal pressed firmly against his own nude abdomen that had been there since he kneeled over the bed. Griffith's view shifts down to stare at it before grabbing it within his palm, "Hair isn't the only physical noticeable change about you, hm?" 

"Wha- what are you playing with it?" "You know what I mean." Hs playfully swings his length side to side. Guts laughs and allows himself to be rolled onto his back. He knows what's coming next, so he gathers Griffith's white hair in his hand and holds it back while he sucks him off.

He pulls away to breathe, "Seems like I'm sucking on a cucumber." It's gotten thicker, especially near the base and he struggles to go down lower than the tip.

Guts smirks, "I'll take that as a compliment." He blindly leans over to the nearby table for the container of oil specifically for this occasion. With his fingers coated, Griffith raises his rear up and whimpers around his cock as Guts slowly presses a finger inside him.

He tries not to make a mess but he does so anyways. So much saliva coats Guts' length and loud slurping noises permeated the air, "I think I'm ready." 

Guts was already three fingers deep in him, "You sure?" Griffith responds by laying down next to him and spreading his legs. Guts settles himself between them and slowly enters him. His blue eyes water and he cries out from the intrusion.

Griffith cradles Guts' face within his hands, "Take me." Their kiss starts off slow then ends up being sloppy when Guts slowly rocks into him.

He stops to smear more oil on his cock and re-enters him. Griffith holds his own legs up and open with his arms. Quite amount of time has passed since their last coupling and this first fuck after a month is such a relief to pent-up frustration. His hips piston inside of him with such force, the bed slides along the floor loudly. He bites Guts' shoulder to muffle his own orgasm, crying out his love for him. It makes him hold his breath while every muscle in his body spasms from its intensity. He slows down his thrusts after Griffith comes down, "You okay?" He smiles.

"Y-yes," he answers, "Been a moment since we've done this is all." His head feels muddled as Guts resumes his pace.

"I won't be long." He gasps. It's taking quite some time, usually they'd finish within close proximity of each other or together. Must be his increased stamina that came with his newfound power.

Guts' beastly growl in his ear startled him as well as the widening girth inside of him, "G-Guts, are you-" he couldn't finish his sentence because the feeling of sharp nails threatening to break his delicate skin at his thigh shuts him up. Griffith bites his own lip as his animalistic lover roughly and messily finishes inside of him. He knows the bed sheets are soiled by now and it'll be a bitch to have to scrub clean. Guts must've realized he was stuck by now after he couldn't withdraw from his depths.

"Shit. I think I've swollen up." He tries again, "I'm not hurting you am I?"

"No," Griffith sighs and pushes his long hair out of his face, wrapping his legs around his waist, "Does it hurt you?"

"Only a little. Mostly when I try to move." Guts carefully maneuvers himself to Griffith's side as to not crush him with his full body weight, "Guess we're stuck together."

He feels Griffith's fingers pet through his spiky hair, "That's also new. Wonder if it'll be a permanent thing with you. I don't mind it at all if it is." This was surprising, Guts thought of it as an annoying hassle and a small price to pay for having sex. Guess he'll have to get used to this.

They lie in silence until he's able to safely pull out, "Ow." He mumbles. His length was beginning to soften and was extremely sensitive. 

"Wow, this hurts you more than it should've hurt me." Griffith grins, "It seems like I should be the one saying 'ow' and in a little sore pain." Guts maneuvers onto his side next to Griffith, "Roll over."

Guts rolls onto his side and Griffith pulls him close to wrap his arms around him. They've never slept this way, normally Griffith was always the smaller spoon. He'd tend to get cold, always demands Guts to hold him and surround him with reassuring warmth. Never complained one bit about it and never asked to be the big spoon. Another man at his back like this would've normally triggered unpleasant thoughts and flashbacks he'd rather not think about. Yet when it's Griffith, it's different.

A repeat of day one, only this time, Griffith is the one holding him like he's afraid he'll be taken away. It's a delightful feeling. He really needed something like this after all the shit he's done and been through. It'll take a long while until he's used to only having one arm. This means bow hunting is over. No reason to think about that for now, Guts released a relaxed sigh and shuts his eye.

Griffith sits up within their ruined bed. Apparently, one of its legs gave out after their rough fucking last night and now it's situated at an awkward angle. Strange, he didn't even hear it give way. He rubs his tired eyes and when he brought his hands down, Guts is there and holding up a mug of tea to his face, "Drink."

Griffith grins and carefully retrieves the hot mug, "Don't mind if I do." There's a plate of fried eggs, some cuts of chicken breast, and slices of apples on his lap as he takes a sip, "Aw, thank you." Wait, apples? That reminds him, "Shit, I just remembered that you wanted me to bake us an apple pie, but it's slipped my mind. I'm sorry."

Guts waves it off, "Doesn't matter right now. Make it whenever you feel like it." He gets down on one knee next to the bed to look at one of its damaged legs, "I noticed you haven't had anything to eat lately. That deer you shot went straight to the dogs, didn't it? They're out there playing with one of its antlers. Right now."

He blows into his mug of tea, "Every last bit, down to the bone. Ugh, you should've seen them when I got back. They were so famished." Griffith stabs the shiny egg yolk with his fork and it pops all over the plate, "Part me wanted to shrivel up and die when I began to fear that I wouldn't see you again."

"Hey, now," He coos, "I'm here and I'm not going anywhere. I said we'll stay out here to grow together and then age together. And that's precisely what we're going to do till the bitter end. I'll be damned if I let you go now." Guts kisses his cheek and Griffith's smile brightens, "Eat up, we've got some cleaning up to do."

They spent a week repairing all weakened or damaged structures from the beast as well as buried their dead. Griffith found three more dogs who were mortally wounded and probably limped away from the pack to pass on alone. A fault in the chicken coop has resulted in a loss of a few hens, snatched up by foxes while they were gone. One of the goats sustained a bite to her ankle, probably a wolf. A normal one thankfully. More than likely, Diva chased it off. Surprisingly, no damage to their crops. Those wild hogs must've gotten the hint.

Another week passes with them constructing a fence around their property, even taller than the last. Guts was on one end of the property working on the fence and Griffith was on the other, tending to their garden. Out of the corner of his eye, he could've sworn he saw something shift within the tall bushes. When he looks again, the movement stops. He stands to his hooves and slowly begins to back away. 

The sun was going down, it was time to return back home and call it a day. On his way back home, Guts steps on something within the dirt. It's his blade, still bloodied from that attack. He can't tell who's blood it is. He leans over to pick it up, glaring back in the direction of their home. It wasn't too far from his current position, he spots Griffith staring suspiciously at something. The wind shifts towards him and blows an all too familiar scent. It enraged him and he quickly changed forms while sprinting towards them, "Griffith!" He screams, spotting Griffith turn around to look at him and that's when the beast leaps out of the bushes.

Griffith ducks as Guts lunged over him to take the bite straight to his throat. Black hair flies everywhere in the struggle, snapping jaws and loud snarls fills the air. Guts manages to make it release his bite on his throat with powerful swats of his claws. He kicks dirt into Guts' face and charges him during his momentary blindness. Griffith has to do something and fast. Scrambling back up to his hooves, he makes a run towards their house.

The beast attempts to chase him but Guts' jaws immediately find their way around its tail and his claws dig into its back. The blade. He ran as fast as his hooves could carry him, back into their home and into their bedroom to find it in the same place he dropped it on the side of the bed. When he returns outside, it has Guts by the throat again and it looks right at him. Griffith scoffs, "You're not so tough, you're only winning this fight because you have more limbs." He mocks and it snarls at him, biting down on Guts' throat even harder. He could tell he was losing oxygen, "Come here."

Griffith hides the blade behind his back and it immediately releases its hold on Guts to run at him. He effortlessly evades the first launch, causing it to slip on the mud of freshly watered potato plants, Griffith uses this opportunity to jab the blade into its lower back. The dagger wasn't much compared to its size, yet it left a nasty wound which singed black smoke like it'd been burnt. Guts was on its back again and bit the back of its head to hold it still. Griffith didn't hesitate. This ends now. The source of their near downfall will be put to the blade or he'll die trying. He thrusts the silver dagger into its throat, and then its chest. Griffith pulls his hand away, but leaves the dagger buried in its flesh.

A pained noise dies in the back of its throat and it falls to the ground where it releases one last exhale. At last. Griffith turns to Guts to hug him as best as he could. His head was larger than his torso and he could barely wrap his arms around the width of his neck, "It's over." He pants and tries to calm his panicked breathing, "It had you by the throat, are you okay?"

Slowly, Guts shrinks to his normal size and skin replaces rough hair within Griffith's hands. He touches his bleeding throat, "It'll heal, just give me an hour." He stares down at its body, "You did it." Guts wraps his arm around his waist. They were soaked in blood. Revenge never felt so sweet.

He rests his head on Guts' chest, "What are we going to do with its body?"

"Hmph. Leave it." Guts frowns, "Let the birds and the bugs eat him." He spits on it, "Now we can truly be at peace."

Griffith pulls on his arm to lead him back inside of their home so they can clean up, "But, Guts, you know your curse is incurable right?"

He nods, "Yes, I know. But I'll learn to like it. Maybe this curse is a blessing in disguise. I can get used to enhanced smell, sight, hearing, stamina, speed, need I go on?"

Griffith glares down his nude form through the corner of his eye, "Not at all."


	6. Epilogue

Over a span of weeks, vultures and scavengers picked its large frame apart until only the bones were left behind. Oddly enough, a lone dandelion sprouts out of what would've been his rib cage next to the dagger that has settled in the dirt, where its heart would've been. The days of fearing that he'll be back were over. The creature who turned him into a beast just like itself has been slain by his lover. If anything, Griffith has been the one protecting him all along. Guts stares at its remains peeking through the grass while they pass by on their horses, "Giving you any bad memories?"

"Not anymore."

Griffith pats Diva on her neck whilst they walk towards pasture. The temperature cooling off meant fall was on its way and it's time to bring the herd back because the heifers will be due for labor in winter. Guts allows Griffith take the lead while he stays at the herd's flank with the dogs. Cattle herding was kind of fun. Especially with Griffith. Never in his life did Guts think he'd end up here. Devoted to a man who should've been his a decade ago. Running away to live together in the woods, saving each other from near death, and now living the rest of their days until they grow old together. Like a fairytale that seems too good to be true. Here he was thinking he's destined to be alone forever. 

Wait, Guts begins to question himself, he pulls on the reins and halts Berry. The herd kept going inside of their corral and Griffith trots back to Guts' side, "Hey, what's wrong?"

He shakes himself out of thought, "N-nothing."

The thought still lingers in his head and refuses to go away. Even now when they have retired into their home and Griffith sets out a slice of freshly baked pie, "Ta-da." He shows off, "Now I know it isn't perfect and I know it came very late since you asked, but-"

"You will age and die before I do." Guts suddenly states, it catches Griffith off guard and his smile disappears.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, I have slower aging now. You'll get old and pass on while I'll still be alive until I'm like, in my nineties maybe." He explains, "I don't want to go on without you. I just can't." The realization hit him hard, and it was something he cannot come into terms with no matter how hard he tries.

Griffith sneers, "Aw, Guts. Come on, you know we all die eventually it's just part of life." He shrugs.

"You don't understand, I can't stand to think about waking up one morning with you unresponsive and stone cold. If such a day comes, I will end my-"

Griffith takes hold of both of his hands over the table as he puts the pieces together in his head, "I get it. Say no more," He cuts him off, "I know what you want to do and I accept."

The full moon shines above him as he watches Griffith's lithe body expand and painfully stretch just like his had done. His desperate cries and screams turn into guttural growls and snarls. Part of him feels bad for putting him through this pain, but in the end, it'll be worth it. To have him at his side for many decades to come. They'll outlive everything else on their land, maybe even everyone else in the Hawks if they are still alive currently. It all seems like a distant memory now. He wonders how things are with any remaining members.

Guts presses his own snout against the white hair on Griffith's back as he stands on all fours. Blue glowing eyes bore into his amber one. It was quite a welcome sight to see. The bite he'd received from him on his wrist has long since healed from when he was bitten. Griffith, of course, isn't in control of his actions. He snaps at Guts and swats at him and Guts allows him to until he settles and can recognize that he isn't a threat and that they are a pack together. Yes, a pack. Mates. He almost wants to mount him just to see what'll happen. As time goes on, he'll learn to better control his beast enough to be able to morph at will just like Guts.

He shakes his beautiful white pelt while Guts takes him in, he follows closely behind him as he takes in his environment and heightened senses. His horns remained, although they appear significantly smaller against his larger lupine head and his oval ears were on the sides of his head rather than on the top and pointy like Guts'. Finally, the hooves on his hind legs stayed. It was a strange combination that looked so well on him. The night is still young and there's plenty of things to do, oh the trouble they can get into together. Guts couldn't contain his excitement, he wags his tail and takes the lead. They shall be "monsters" together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this is the end. Thank you all for the kind words, support, and motivation. Also, thank you all for sticking with this fic until the bitter end. I've seen all of your comments, and seriously, thank you all! Hope you've found joy reading this.


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